Carl's Jr. Rip Off Burger

Don't worry Carl's Jr., the joke's on me isn't it? Bastards.

OK, so I made this...

It's a hamburger with guacamole, pepper jack cheese, tomato and onion, wrapped in a lettuce leaf. It was copied from inspired by a Six Dollar Low Carb burger I'd gotten from Carl's Jr. (that's what yankees call Hardy's). I'd thought I was doing so well. It was low carb. No bun. Paleo. Diet. Yes? NO!

I was curious about how many calories were in it, because it was as big as my head. I had decided to make them at home (much smaller) and see how many calories I could shave off.

Do you know how many calories are in those damned things?!

810.

Jebus, that's insane.

My version used 5 oz. of 85% lean meat, was much smaller AND I skipped the bacon and still wound up with a 550 calorie burger! The guac was about 110 of that and the cheese was 90. You take away the guac and cheese and it's just a damn patty with lettuce, tomato and onion. Dammit.

Well, I won't be making any more of these. I do wish I'd added up the calories BEFORE making this for a second time this week! Oh well.